As therapists, we talk a lot about emotions and are even sometimes referred to as “feelings doctors.” This is an interesting reference, because it might imply that emotions are problems that need to be fixed – mental illnesses that need to be treated toward a ‘cure’ just as we go to doctors for physical illnesses. And since therapists do operate within a diagnostic framework, we have to be aware of not pathologizing the things that actually make us human beings. However, mental illnesses are not the exact same as physical illnesses.

Gender affirming healthcare quite literally saves lives; studies show it lowers rates of suicidal

ideation as well as reported psychological distress according to the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health.

Concerns about age, cultural and social factors, safety, and fully-informed consent, in addition

to regulations around it, can bring a level of controversy to this type of healthcare. While it’s not unheard of for persons who undergo these types of procedures to experience regret about having done so, it’s incredibly rare (less than 1% according to 27 different studies).

Surgery is not the only gender-affirming care option to consider. There are many options aside from surgical ones to address gender identity that may feel more approachable or accessible.

Some options, including hormone replacement therapy (HRT) have effects that can be reversible if the treatment is discontinued.

Therapy can be a nonlinear, unclear process that at times makes progress difficult to measure. 

Although therapists utilize “evidence-based practices”, which are theories, tools, and interventions that have been indicated to be effected through research, the process is considered an art as much as a science in terms of how it actually leads to those outcomes. 

There may be days where therapy didn’t feel like it did much of anything at all, and there might be days where it makes you rethink your whole life. 

So how do you know if therapy is effective for you? 

There’s so much that goes into this question, and ultimately whether or not therapy is effective has to be defined by the person themselves, because everyone has a different goal that they bring to therapy. That being said, here are some experiences shared by our staff about the different things that can happen throughout the process of therapy to indicate progress: 

The more partners that are involved in a relationship, oftentimes the more difficult it is to meet those three conditions. Even in a dyadic relationship (which is a relationship that includes two people), partners run into all sorts of roadblocks to staying attuned to one another. And technically, there is no such thing as a relationship that is only between two people. There are infinite interfering variables: occupations, children, domestic responsibilities, friends, family members, hobbies, in-laws. You get the picture. All of these factors can get in the way. And now imagine adding more people to the intimate partnership–and all of their variables–their lived experiences, previous relationships, wants and needs (and potentially other current partners), as well!

September is National Suicide Prevention month, and unfortunately, we are still a long-ways away from making a dent in suicide rates in this Country. 

In fact, studies have found that rates have actually been steadily increasing by about 2% each year in the United States.

In 2021, suicide was the 11th leading cause of death overall in the United States, claiming the lives of over 48,100 people. 

There is always new and emerging research on what causes suicide ideation, how it can be recognized, and how it can be treated–and we don’t yet have all of the answers, but here are some patterns we do see.

Sometimes people come to therapy because they feel like they’re “supposed” to, but they can’t quite articulate what it is they’re looking for. Maybe something is feeling off in their life or they aren’t meeting the goals and expectations they have for themselves. 

It doesn’t help that we have so many platitudes cropping up related to mental health in the last decade. Open ended, vague encouragements to “work on yourself”, “do the work”, and “work on your mental health” make many of us feel that there’s definitely something we’re supposed to be doing with a therapist that’s going to improve our everyday life, but we don’t actually know what that thing is. And therapy is something that takes place behind closed doors more so than a personal training session or a new diet–it's cloaked in mystery, which can make it a bit intimidating.

One of the primary complaints that I find people often have against therapy is the cost. It should be free, right?

Well honestly, I really don’t disagree with you. I would be thrilled to be in a place where I could provide therapy for free. I believe that it's healthcare. And while I hesitate to ever say that anyone needs therapy, I strongly believe that everyone deserves therapy who wants to access it.

Unfortunately, the system that we currently operate under in this country doesn’t make this easy. It actually seems to make it as difficult as possible in many ways.

Many clients ask me about “what is wrong” with them. Often when they say this, they are looking for something to explain or blame for their struggles. People without deep knowledge or understanding of the diagnostic framework seem to see diagnoses and disorders as a very distinct and objective measure or label that is placed onto them by an “expert.” However, the history of diagnosis is wrought with oppression and bias; it is fundamentally flawed and at the same time can be incredibly useful for clients and clinicians.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is often considered one of the most misunderstood and stigmatized diagnoses a person can receive. Living with BPD can be an intense, sometimes painful experience, but is by no means guaranteed to be a hardship forever. Talking about BPD inherently involves talking about differential diagnosis, which is the process of distinguishing a diagnosis from others that may present with similar symptoms and have overlapping features. Differential diagnosis also involves ruling out (as much as possible) contextual, developmental, and chemical (substance) influences on symptoms.

We are committed to fostering a culture of diversity, equity, and inclusion in all aspects of our work, and we hope that starting this blog will allow us to make more space for issues that affect marginalized communities, offer education and insight around mental health topics, and allow us to provide these resources at no extra cost.